Thursday, June 14, 2007

Lost


I have never been a hugh fan of the television series, LOST, but I am sort of feeling what they are going through. I feel lost being in this town. I am beginning to wonder why I have stayed in Montgomery, Alabama. At first, it was to continue to support the youth group at Vaughn Park, but I feel that I am no longer needed, and I feel I need to go somewhere else and help with a youth group. I am not saying that I need to go somewhere to find acceptance, but I have not left Montgomery. I feel that the teens still look up to me, and miss me. From the day that I left the work at Vaughn Park, it has never been the same. I knew things were going to chanage, but it seems to me that my work should not be forgotten. It is not about me, but there is no longer the sense to belong in this state.

It is a daily process to get out of here because I am not happy with myself, or things that have happened down here. I am want so badly to be near my family and friends. Gosh, it would save so much traveling, so that I can go and have a lot more fun. So, with saying that, I am want to move back to Tennessee. I have been through several interviews, since my vacation, in April, and I am about to do another one. This is another area that I feel lost at. Like I said before, I am willing to anything to get me back to Tennessee, except working in a bank. I feel that I have been passed over certain jobs that I deserve. I know that I have to have patience, and wait for God to act, but this has been difficult. Please pray for me as I struggle with this because leaving can not come soon enough. Hopefully, this job at Lifeway Corporate Headquarters will be the one. It is job that has to with my major in college, and I feel that my education will not go to waste. I did not become a Wachovia Bank Teller for a career. Looking back on it, I wished I never became a teller. I wonder why I got thrown into this position? We will save that blogger topic for another day.

If it were not for the small group that I am asscoiated with, I would feel more lost in this town. They have taken me in, and made me one of their own. I just wish I knew what I needed to do because I do not where to go, except to Tennessee. I feel that if I do not get away from this area, I am going to continue to struggle with things that are not needed in my life. When are things going to change, and what direction do I need to take, so that I will not feel so lost?

3 comments:

Cristin Claire said...

Hey Johnny. I know things are tough for you right now and you are dying to leave Montgomery, but keep in mind that God has a much bigger plan for you. Maybe you just needed to stay put until this Lifeway opportunity oppened up. This could be the change you have been looking for! I know God has great things in store for you, so keep holding your head up high and know that everything is in His hands. Walt and I love you and are praying for you daily. Can't wait to see you tomorrow!

Brooke Shands said...

Hey!! I know that things will start looking up for you! God is watching out for you. He has a GREAT plan for you!!! He will use you in ways you will never be able to imagine! We are praying for you!!

Lerra said...

I know everyone else is saying the same thing, but God does have a plan for you. Usually we don't figure out His plan until it has already fallen into place. Hopefully it will fall into place for you soon so you can find a sense of belonging!