One of those

I have been told that I have been sad for the past couple of days. To be honest with you have been disappointed with how things turned out, but not sad. Sometimes, things have a way of working out in a way that you do not expect it to. I am a pretty happy person, and things seem not to bother me as much as they use to. I hate when people say you are not smiling. How do they know how I am feeling? I am very happy to be here, but there are times that I miss being around the things at home.

I have had one of those weeks that I wished that would not have been. I owe a big thanks for Walt, my intern for being there. He has helped me forget about the things that are going on. Somethings that have happened have effected the way I do my job. I have developed an attitude, and I apologize to the ones that I have been short with. Some of those times that I have developed an attitude, I think it was for a good cause. When I am mean, or coming down too hard, it usually because people are not listening to me. When I say stop, it is like, lets see how far you can test me before I have a heart attack. Yesterday, I was very disappointed in how things were going, I could not say anything, but think of my vacation coming up in August. I was not angry at the car wash, but what was happening among the group. It was like some of the teens got up on the rebellious side of the bed, and that affected the whole group.

This I blame on myself. Usually, I am good about getting stuff together that Jamin does not have to tell me to do it. I totally forgot to setup the stuff for the car wash, and after I learned what was going on, I should have set it up. Some of it was my laziness, and forgetfulness. To Jamin, I apologize for that.

Like I said before, somethings do not workout for the best, but it is how I get through those things that make me stronger. Let me start with last Thursday. As most of you know that I was going to visit a friend at camp that I wanted to get to know a little more, and things did not workout as I had wanted. It made me feel like I did something wrong to her, and I got told be a lot of people that I did not do anything wrong. So, I have avoided the whole thing, and the drama that was associated it. This whole ordeal had an impact on my life. It made me emotional depressed, and that was causing me to have attitude that I usually do not have. So, Monday, I prayed to God that he would take control of the whole situation, and he has. Then, I went and talked to a great friend and minister, Ross about the whole thing, on Tuesday, and he helped me get through it. So, I am waiting on her, and see what she is going to do, but I have moved on, too. Also, today, I ran into someone I least expected at a resturant that Walt, Liz, and I were eating at. A girl that I was getting to know last Fall was sitting right behind us, and it became awkward, and we had to go. I did not know that she was sitting there, until she got up to get something, and I saw her, I lost me appetite. So, we left on my command, and I never looked back.

Impact can not come soon enough. I am ready to go back to Tennesse and see some friends that I have not seen in a while. I guess I am running away from things, but I think that I really deserve a break. So, at Impact, I was suppose to stay with one of my good friends from Tennessee. I found out today that his wife was going to have an enduced birth. The doctors are not worried about the baby, but the wife, Jennifer, is who they are worried about. The baby is two months early, but Jennifer is having blood pressure problems, and that is weighing on my mind, too.

I have been through a lot this week, but I am so blessed that God put people in my life to help calm me down.